Photo by Neil Thomas on Unsplash
Imagine you're going through a tough time, feeling sad, frustrated, or stressed about something in your life, and someone responds by saying:
"Stay positive, everything will be fine!"
"It’s not a big deal."
"Look on the bright side!”
While the intention may be to encourage a positive mindset, this excessive positivity dismisses the reality of your emotions and doesn't acknowledge the complexity of your experiences. It creates pressure to always appear happy and upbeat, even when facing legitimate difficulties.
Toxic positivity is a term used to describe the tendency to always maintain a positive outlook while dismissing or invalidating any negative emotions or experiences. Although positivity itself is certainly not harmful, it can turn problematic when it ignores genuine feelings, struggles, or challenges. Too much of a good thing isn’t always great!
It's crucial to recognize that embracing a range of emotions, both positive and negative, is a natural part of being human. Suppressing or denying negative emotions can be harmful in the long run, as it prevents you from addressing the root causes of your feelings and finding healthy ways to cope. It's important to foster a balanced approach that allows for a range of emotions and encourages authentic expression rather than forcing a facade of constant positivity.
Next time when someone confides in you about going through a tough time, try these responses instead:
“I’m sorry you’re going through this.”
“That must be really hard.”
“Is there anything I can do to support you?”
By acknowledging the pain they’re feeling, you’re validating their emotions and providing a safe space to feel everything. It will get better, but right now, that future feels so distant to those going through a tough time that your words mean more than you can imagine.
To paraphrase Adam Grant, strength comes from feeling supported, not forced smiles.
Written by: Emily Henion, Search Consultant at Hunter Crown, LLC
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